


Going Down

by benjlover3604



Category: Batman (Comics)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-11
Updated: 2017-02-10
Packaged: 2018-09-23 10:46:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9652556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/benjlover3604/pseuds/benjlover3604
Summary: After losing her legs Barbara fights to remain part of the family, when family lines are blurred with Bruce she has to decide where she fits in this new life............“Watch yourself.” He said through his teeth. She watched as his jaw clenched.No push him. Keep pushing.“Well excuse me Batman, did that one hit a little too close to the truth?”Reaching up he ripped the cowl from his head, “This is me. Bruce. Telling you to watch your damn mouth!” he growled.Barbara knew he was at his breaking point. But she couldn’t stop herself, he had pushed her too far already.  “Or what Bruce…..You’ll finish what the Joker started!?”...........





	

I don’t own anything xxx  
Xxx  
Xxx  
Xxx  
She tasted the blood in her mouth before she actually felt the pain; hitting the ground flat on her stomach. She didn’t even have enough left in her to hit the panic button on her belt, not that anyone would come. She had shut everyone out, and worse she thought it made her stronger. She could feel the blood soaking through her suit from the gash on her side. She remembered hitting the fire escape on the way down there must have been a lose bar sticking out somewhere. 

She thought back to the weeks before this and tried to pick out the point where everything had turned bad.

Who are you kidding it was all bad…..well not all

Her laugh turned into a wheeze as she vomited up some blood. God she had really stepped in it this time. What would they think when they found her here, secretly she hopped some bum would run across her corpus and take her costume. She didn’t want the bat symbol to be reduced to a sloppy mess in some damp ally. 

She never remembered pain like this, which was saying something. Waking up in the hospital after the Joker had shot her was a blessing. The doctors said she was under for most of the pain, not that she wouldn’t have taken any pain to have her legs back. 

A lot of good they did me, I’ve got my legs back and look at them. Laying here like I’m still in the chair. 

That damned chair. That fucking chair. She would not become that chair. The anger that flew through her was like fire running through her veins. It gave her just enough to roll herself over and press the bat symbol on her belt. A high pitched tone filled the air. She knew it wouldn’t be long, Alfred would be dispatching the others to her. And they would find her laying there in her own blood and they would have to save her. Once again poor Barbara needed help, she couldn’t do anything on her own. 

Maybe I’ll get lucky and bleed to death before they get here 

She would take bleeding out in an ally over Bruce’s gaze; she could already see the look he would give her as he scrapped her body off the pavement. The look that was 90% “I told you so” and 10% “disappointment” he had told her she wasn’t ready to be back on the streets. But had she listened, no. 

Her mind went back to the bat cave; it must have been almost nine months ago now. She knew Bruce and Dick were out on patrol. Tim was still god knows where on some special mission with the teen titans; and Jason, well Jason was Jason. He was always around somewhere. So she had hoped she could have gotten in and out without being seen, but that’s not how it worked out.

She had just been released from the hospital. The chair was still new to her and her arms burned from the constant use. It had been no small feat even getting to Wayne manor. She had to call a handi-cab. The van was a large white beast with a wheel chair painted on the side. When she saw it pull onto her street she almost went back inside. 

Better get used to it Barbara, this is your life now. 

She had the cabbie drop her off at the end of the block, she didn’t think many handicap women would be dropped off at Bruce Waynes house at almost midnight. By the time she got to the gate her arms burned more than when she was sparring with Dick. Putting the brakes on, she hit the buzzer for the gate. Then waited, soon she smiled as she heard Alfred’s voice over the intercom. 

“Miss Gordon, my goodness. What are you doing at the front gate?” He asked 

She smiled and shook her head. “Well the back isn’t exactly handicap accessible.” She answered. She sighed, Alfred didn’t deserve her venom. He had nothing to do with what happened to her. “I’m sorry Alfred, do you think I can come in?” she said nicer. 

“Please do, I have just finished making a late dinner.” The gate buzzed and then opened slowly. 

Looking up at the house her shoulders fell, how come she never noticed how far the manor was from the front gate? 

“This was a great idea.” She said as she started pushing herself up the driveway. 

Xxx  
Xxx

Alfred had met her half way up, offering to push her to the door, but she refused. She would have to get used to chair sooner or later. He had excused himself when she asked if she could use the service lift down to the cave, saying that he lots more to do before he started the new day in the morning. 

As she rolled toward the bat computer she wondered if that man ever stopped working. 

The thought was pushed out as she signed into her login. The computer came alive under her finger tips, as she scrolled through the cases she had missed, she had only been in the hospital for 2 weeks yet Bruce and Dick had but away five mob bosses closed down two drug rings and even saved a family from a robbery. 

Just another week in Gotham. 

 

As she pushed away from the desk a small folder in the corner of the screen caught her eye. Normally the screen is filled with folders so that wasn’t the unusual part. But this folder was unnamed, Bruce was organized to a T. leaving a file unnamed was like leaving a thumbtack in your shoe. 

When she clicked on it a new window popped up, saying she was unauthorized to few the file. That couldn’t be right; there were not hidden files on the computer, that would defile the purpose of having it on the computer. This was where everyone came to get information on their cases. 

Strange….. who would lock a file? 

Rolling her eyes as she encrypted the code, in all of twenty seconds, causing the file to spill across the screen like a water fountain. 

She couldn’t help the gasp that fell from her lips as he eyes flicked around the screen. There were crime reports and photos, but not just any, they were from her apartment. They were of her. The joker must have taken them after she had passed out. She could clearly see the bullet hole through her stomach. As she clicked through her shock turned to horror, new photos showed her naked lying in her own blood. She didn’t remember this, why had no one told her. Was she…..did the Joker…..

I would know, I would feel different……. Then again I’m not feeling much below the bellybutton these days. 

She ran her hands through her hair quickly trying to real in her feeling. Why hadn’t anyone told her about this? She had a right to know. Damn it she had the NEED to know!

Anger flowed through her, a new emotion she seemed to be expressing more and more these days. Moving quickly, she pulled up the note pad on the screen, then in all caps left a message. She rolled away leaving all the photos up under her note. 

She pushed the button for the elevator and sat with her arms crossed. Who all had seen these? Bruce? Tim? Dick? Hell had Alfred seen them!? 

Bruce had no right to keep this from her. She knew he would come home and see the note, she knew he would come to her apartment to check on her. After all she was poor weak Batgirl, couldn’t even trust her with information about her own self!  
Xxx  
Xxx  
Xxx

Bruce walked up the ramp with Dick, they had come straight back when Alfred had said something was wrong with Barbara. When he got to the top of the stairs he was waiting. 

“Hello sir.” 

“Where is barb?” Dick asked looking around.

“Miss Gordon left about thirty minutes before your return.” He answered looking from Dick back to Bruce. “I believe you will want to see the computer sir.”

Bruce moved swiftly toward the platform, as he rounded the corner he sighed. 

“What…What is it?” Dick asked coming up beside him. When he saw the computer stopped, “Oh.”

They both had seen the photos of Barbara that the Joker had taken. They had all agreed it was best if she never found out; they were trying to keep the pain from what happened from her. She had lost so much already, they didn’t know where her breaking point would have been. 

Dick turned to walk out, “I’ll go talk to her.” He called over his shoulder. 

“No.” Bruce said. Stopping him in his tracks. “This was my decision. I should be the one to tell her.”

Dick shook his head, “But she’ll take it better from me. Bruce you’re not exactly Mr. Shoulder to cry on.” 

As he closed out the files on the computer he turned and pulled the cowl back over his face. “Stay here.” He said then climbed into the Bat-mobile. “End of discussion.” He added as the door closed. Then he was gone, speeding into the darkness.

Bruce rubbed his temple as he drove toward Barbara’s home. He should have doubled encrypted that file. Closing his eyes her message burned into the back of his eyelids. 

 

I deserved to know!

 

As the bat-mobile skidded to a stop in the ally a few blocks away from Barbara’s he shot his zip line to the roof of the neighboring building. Jumping from building to building he stopped when he got to hers. 

The apartment was completely dark except for one light in the living room, Barbara sat in front of her door looking at the spot where she was shot. She was sitting in her chair in her pajamas her hair was wet and hung lose around her face.   
With a sigh he pushed himself off the edge of the building and to her balcony door. He noted with mild shock that it was unlocked. Maybe when she was batgirl an unlocked door would have been okay. But now she needed to remember to keep this locked. Pushing it open he walked silently to the living room, where he stood watching her for a few more minutes. 

“I know your there.” She said not looking up from the floor. “I cribbed not deaf.” She added then turned her chair to look at him.

He towered above her now that she was chair bound. Tilting her head back she met his eyes. 

“Well are you going to say something?” she asked. The anger was back once more. She couldn’t wait to hear his excuse for keeping those photos from her. 

But Bruce remained silent. He just stood there and watched her. She stared right back until her fury became too much and she snapped.

“Come on Bruce TELL ME! what could possibly justify keeping something like that from me?! How could you….HOW COULD YOU!” She screamed at him. She mildly noted that she had used his name, they were never to use names when they wore the cowl. But right now she didn’t care. Who did he think he was, what else was he hiding?

“What else aren’t you telling me?! Come on Bruce, what you don’t think I can handle it!” She pushed herself toward him so she could jab her finger into his upper abdomen. “You have always done this! ALWAYS! You never thought I was good enough, you never complimented me like you did the boys. You always coddled me. You never backed me up. YOU. TOUGHT. I. WAS. WEAK.!” She said poking her finger into his stomach with each word. 

Bruce moved so fast she didn’t even see him shift his body. Knocking her hand away from his stomach he reached out and held her jaw in one hand. 

“And this is you being strong? This is what you’re telling me to be proud off?” he let her pull her chin from his grasp. “You’re shouting throwing a fit like a toddler. Yes, I decided to keep some things from you. I thought it would make this just a little easier. I was trying to help.” Bruce crossed his arms and straightened his shoulders. Making him appear that much taller.

Barbara lost it she grabbed the flower pot on the table and threw it right at his head, using the moment of surprise she used her arms to throw herself at his midsection. She connected with his upper body but was easily tossed aside as Bruce tuned to block the pot. 

Barb landed with a loud thud as he back slammed against the lower cabinets, her legs tangled under her causing her to fall on her side. When she righted herself her eyes were like daggers at the man in front of her. 

“Fuck you Bruce.” She said leaning on her arm. Pulling her legs straight in front of her she spit back in his direction, “Get out of my house.”

“I won’t leave you there.” He said.

The red filled her eyes, what did he think she was going to let him help her up? After everything he just said? 

“Why not? It won’t be the first time you let a side kick down.” She knew it was a low blow. Jason was one subject you didn’t touch with him. Even when Jason came back Bruce still was a bleeding heart over the whole thing. Still blaming himself. 

Again the speed at which he moved made her blink quickly trying to keep up with him. His hands landed on either of her shoulders, pinning her back to the cabinets. 

“Why do you insist on acting like a child!” He said shouting in her face. “How dare you talk about things you don’t understand!” he pushed her back even harder, “I died that day!” 

“Am I a child Bruce, or am I just the first one to call you on your BULLSHIT!” she shouted right back inching closer to his face. “Were all disposable to you! All of us, think god I got shot, it must save you some grief over how you were going to get rid of me! Once again the Joker does your dirty work for you.” She knew she was spiting but she didn’t care, she would not be called a child, not after what she had overcome. 

“Oh wait maybe that’s your plan, just wait around till the Joker kills off each of us!” the emotion inside her were going crazy. She felt so many things anger sadness…..lust?

She couldn’t help but feel that even through the rage, his body pressed against hers with his face centimeters from hers. She could smell his sweat and musk through his suit. For some reason, it made her body ache. 

“Watch yourself.” He said through his teeth. She watched as his jaw clenched.

No push him. Keep pushing.

“Well excuse me Batman, did that one hit a little too close to the truth?” 

Reaching up he ripped the cowl from his head, “This is me. Bruce. Telling you to watch your damn mouth!” he growled.

Barbara knew he was at his breaking point. But she couldn’t stop herself, he had pushed her too far already. “Or what Bruce…..You’ll finish what the Joker started!?” 

The growl that tour from his throat didn’t sound human his jaw pressed closed and his hands tightened their squeeze, “HOW DARE….” He started but was cut off by Barbara thrusting her lips onto his. She threw her arms around his neck pulling him completely on top of her. 

Bruce’s chest rumbled as he kissed her back, letting her hands roam up and down his chest. 

Barbara slipped her tongue into his mouth tasting him for the first time. Slowly he wrapped his arm around her waist pulling her midsection fully to him. 

For a split second Bruce forgot where he was, he let all his restraints go. Fighting for control of the kiss he forced his tongue over hers and into her mouth. He could feel her hands scaling his body, over his and chest then slowly down his abdomen. Had she always smelt this good, like cherries and lime. It must be her soap he thought to himself inhaling deep enjoying her smell.

“Bruce.” She moaned, snapping him out of his haze.  
He pulled back holding her at arm’s length. 

They looked at each other for a moment, Barbara’s chest was rising and falling as she tried to control her breathing, her eyes never left his. 

Bruce on the other hand was completely still. Silently he stood letting his hands drop from her shoulders. Then without a word he turned and walked back to the glass door. 

“Wait.” She said reaching a hand out to him. 

He paused with his hand on the door knob. Pulling the cowl back down he turned to look at her.

“Did he…” she swallowed hard. “I mean was I….” he eyes flicked over to the where she was shot. For all the courage and guts she had she couldn’t bring herself to say the word.

“No.” He said then watched her.

She couldn’t help the smile that pulled at the edge of her mouth, eyes closed her head fell back and rested on the cabinets. At last some good news. 

A laugh bubbled out of her mouth and surprisingly it was real, “Well at least there is that.” She said then looked back at him. 

“I’m sorry. For what I said.” She pushed a hand through her hair. 

He nodded and then turned around again, before he disappeared into the darkness on her balcony he made her a promise. 

“I’ll find a way to heal you. I promise.” Then he was gone and nothing was left but the sound of the door closing and the click of the lock falling into place.   
Xxx  
Xxx  
Xxx  
Xxx

Bruce sat at the computer looking at the large screen in front of him. Page after page of healing ideas and therapy for people like Barbara. None of which helped. They were all about learning to live with what happened, to move on and accept the new you. 

Everywhere he turned it was the same thing, everything pointed to the same word. Permanent. 

He was so caught up in what he was doing he didn’t hear Alfred walk up beside him. 

“Any improvement Master Bruce?” He asked setting down a tray of food beside him. 

“None.” He answered scrolling threw more pages. 

“Well I should try and convince you to eat and get some sleep. But I suppose that is a moot point?” Alfred looked at him. 

“Thank you, for the meal.” Bruce said moving it slightly out of the way. 

“Please keep in mind that you will do no one any good malnourished sir.” Alfred said then added as he passed through the door to leave, “You’re not superman.” 

The words make him turn. He might not be superman but he has the next best thing. Pushing back from the desk he walked over to a small locker on the far side of the cave. 

Pushing his palm to the flat side of it, a blue light glowed under his hand. After the scan was done the locker opened to reveal a safe. This one required a retinal scan, then with the same blue glow it opened.

Inside the safe was cold, and for good reason. Reaching in he pulled a small vile out, inside the liquid was thick and dark. 

Wrapping his fist around the glass he closed his eyes, inside this vile was blood. And not just any blood, the blood of a god. The blood of Superman. 

He had gotten it almost a year ago, when the battle with dooms day almost killed them all. They had survived by the skin of their teeth. Clark had needed to be taken to space to recharge by the sun for almost three days after that. On the way up, Clark had been unconscious and Bruce had seen an opportunity. He had taken a small sample of his blood and kept it. But there was so little of it, the cut on Clarks arm had already started to heal by the time Bruce had gotten the idea.

 

What if Clarks healing powers were linked in his blood, and what if injecting Clarks blood into Barbara could heal her. There were some serious concerns, he had no idea what this blood would do to her. Maybe there was just too much of a risk. 

Putting the blood back into the safe he shut the doors. He needed to save her, but he wasn’t ready to gamble with her life. The blood would have to be a last resort. 

Xxx  
Xxx  
Xxx

 

Barbara rolled down the street, her arms no longer burned as she pushed herself along. It had been months since that night in her apartment with Bruce. Her days now were filled with physical therapy and reading. Her skills on the computer also grew, being stuck in her chair she had limited ways to help the team, but no one in the bat family had her hacking skills. 

 

But it wasn’t enough, her days seemed to blur together. The excitement was gone from her day to day life and she could feel it effecting her mind set. She ached for the thrill of the hunt, for the rush of hand to hand combat with some punk or thug in the street. The feel of the wind blowing by her as she swung from roof to roof.

 

Down town Gotham was a hard place, especially after dark. But it wasn’t fear that made her hand shake as she rolled down the dark sidewalks. It was the ecstasy of the unknown; she could feel the men that she had passed about a block back following her. There were three of them, and right now they were about 75 feet behind her walking slowly. She shifted in her seat to make sure she could feel her gun on her thigh. It shot an electrical charge large enough to knock out a horse, these assholes wouldn’t know what hit them. 

With a smile she turned into a dead end ally. Going all the way to the end the shadows seemed to swallow her and even in her chair she was able to hide silently. The men turned into the same street and she was able to hear them more clearly. 

“Where did she go?” The tall one asked from the middle, he had a long nose and pot marked face. 

The other two looked like twins both with short hair and fat stubby faces. None looked to be older than 25. 

“It’s not like she could have out run us.” The tall one said again earning a laugh from his goons. 

Barbara could feel the rage again. It was so common now, every day she had to push down the blinding rage she still felt inside of her. Some days were better than others, tonight for example. Nights like tonight the rage was too much to push down, there needed to be an outlet for her anger or it threatened to take over her mind. 

Using the rush of anger, she pushed her chair out of the shadow and in front of the men.

“Was it me you were looking for?” she asked folding her hands in her lap.

The men jumped back startled, then the leader stepped toward her, “Damn baby, you like a ninja or something?”   
Barbara smiled sweetly at him, “Or something.” 

The two laughed from behind, “Don’t think you’re doing much Kung-Fu in that chair.” 

She pulled the smile tight, “I get by just fine.” 

Mr. Tall shook his head, “Now look fellas you upset her.” He moved around so he was on her right side the motioned for the others to do the same. Now they had trapped in the ally. Or so they thought.

“I would like to apologies for my friends here, they have no idea how to treat a lady.” His smile making his nose look even bigger as he turned up his face. “I on the other hand, could make you scream.” He leaned into her “In a good way.” They all stopped to laugh, then started to circle her chair. 

Barbara kept her eyes forward not needing to follow them with her eyes. The smile was now completely gone from her face. She felt one of the men lift a strand of her hair behind her. 

“I don’t like to be touched.” She said looking at the leader who reappeared to her left. “Even by someone as talented with the ladies as yourself. Mr….?”

“Oh my name is Frankie baby doll, don’t worry you won’t forget……..you’ll be screaming it soon.” He moved quickly but was clumsy with the small knife he had pulled from his belt. He pressed it too hard to her neck in his excitement and the blade bit into her skin. 

Still she didn’t move her hands to get her gun, her pulse was rising every second the adrenaline pumping threw her body made her feel more alive than she had in weeks. 

She had just opened her mouth to taunt him some more when three loud pops filled the air. Then she was alone in dark, the three men laid on the ground a single bullet hole in each of their heads. 

She closed her eyes and her head fell back in disappoint against her head rest. She didn’t need to open them to know that Jason was leaning against the wall to her right.

“I had that under control.” She said her eyes still closed. “You didn’t need to kill them”

“That’s not what I saw.” He said tucking his .45 back into his belt. 

“Well maybe you’re not as sharp as you think you are.” Barbara spat at him. Looking at him she watched as he pulled his hood down and unclipped his helmet. 

“Nothing like misplaced anger to say a big thank you.” He said back to her. 

“Oh you want me to thank you? For what barging in on things that don’t concern you?” She spun her chair around so she could face him. 

“Call me a bleeding heart, but I’m a sucker for a damsel in distress.” 

“That’s not what I am! I don’t NEED saving! I can handle some street punks. I don’t need you or anyone else protecting me.” 

Jason just watched her, waiting for her to continue. 

“I’m so sick of everyone tip toeing around me because they think that I’m too weak to handle what has happened to me. I’ve accepted what has happened, I’ve moved on. It’s time you all did too.” 

“Maybe if you don’t go around looking for trouble, we would have to keep an eye on you all the time. Trust me I have more important things to do then baby set some hormonal cripple.” 

“WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?!” She said leaning forward getting as close to him as she could. 

“Look sister you can’t have it both ways, either you have accepted what happened to you or you haven’t. make up your mind.”

“I HAVE! Doesn’t mean I want it shoved in my face by people. You fucking undead psychopath!” 

“There you go! Let it out!” Jason laughed. “I know what a freak I am, I HAVE accepted it. And I have vices to release all the anger that your feeling now.” He smiled and pulled his two guns from his belt. “I call them Tina and Sam. And they are the most beautiful girls in the world.”

 

Barbara sat back again and looked at him. She shouldn’t have called him that, it wasn’t fair to him. Everything that he had been through.

She couldn’t help but smile at him as he kissed both guns and put them back, “So your saying that I should start killing people?” She asked him only being semiserious.

“Maybe, could you imagine the headlines? Handy cap killer strikes again, the only clue left behind is her tire marks trailing blood and brain matter away from the crime scenes.” Jason’s eyes seemed to light up at the thought. 

Barbara did laugh this time, long and loud. It felt good but the feeling soon faded as Jason spoke again.

“I have to tell him. You know that right?” He said as he pulled his mask back on his face.

“Yeah I know.” She said then started toward her apartment. With any luck, Bruce, wouldn’t be waiting too long before she got there. Casting a look over her shoulder she watched as Jason scaled the side of the building. The image made her heart drop to the bottom of her chest, just one more thing she would never do again. 

Xxx  
Xxx  
Xxx

“It’s the third time this month Bruce.” Jason said standing in the Bat cave. Alfred gave him a worried look then turned to look at Bruce.

“And this time I had to step in. She didn’t even flinch when they cut her.” 

“I’ll talk to her.” Bruce said walking over to his costume. 

“Sir if I might make a suggestion? How do you think she feels seeing you all in full gear when she is unable to be part of that life anymore? If you’re going to talk to her, maybe do so as yourself and not as the batman.”

“Alfred people can’t just see Bruce just walk into an apartment building down town.” Jason said shaking his head. 

“Master Jason, I don’t believe I ever said anything about anyone seeing him.”

Xxx  
Xxx  
Xxx

Barbara was sitting on the floor in her living room, she was doing her nightly workouts. All her doctors told her the same thing, even though they couldn’t move on their own, her legs must be stretched and moved multiple times a day to keep them healthy. Her arms were another story, she kept them toned by her daily moving in the chair, of course that didn’t stop her from using her custom pull up bar that was installed for her. 

Sweat was just starting to form on her brow when her balcony door opened. Looking up she was surprised to see Bruce, not that him being here was surprising, his outfit on the other hand was. 

She had only seen him in normal cloths maybe once or twice in her life, so the jeans and dark long sleeved shirt were different to say the least. 

 

She sighed as she moved to face him. “I’m guessing you talked to Jason?”   
He nodded then walked over to her, “We need to talk.” 

She mumbled under her breath then went back to move her legs up and down on the floor. 

“Barbara.” 

“I’m not going anywhere, go ahead and talk.” She said not bothering to look at him. Her attitude was about more then what happened today. Months had gone by since she had kissed him in this very apartment, and he acted like nothing was different. He acted like it never happened. Of course she didn’t expect him to declare his love for her or anything but she did expect him to say something.

At the very least she expected a disappointment lecture, but no he remained silent. And that pissed her off.

 

“We need to talk about your behavior lately.” 

“Like I said, I’m not going anywhere.” She switched to her left leg.

Bruce ran a hand threw his hair and sighed, “Barbara what are you hoping to get from beating up street thugs?” 

“I don’t see the problem, I have done that for almost two years now.” She answered not looking at him.

“It’s different now, and you know it.” 

She clenched her jaw and chose not to answer him. 

“If you need help over coming what happened to you, I can set up..” He stared but was cut off.

“I DON’T NEED YOUR FUCKING HELP.” She screamed at him. “Even if I don’t have my legs, I can take care of a couple of low lives. I’m not as weak as you think.”

“I never said you were weak.” He said crossing his arms.

Barb pulled her chair to her, with easy she lifted herself into the seat, never breaking eye contact with Bruce.

“You didn’t have too.” She rolled her way over to her fridge and took out a bottle of water. “I can see it in your eyes. All of you. You all look at me like…like I’m not me.” She took a quick swig of water and went on, “Why do you think I stopped coming to the cave?”

“I didn’t want to pry.” Bruce answered moving to be across from her.

“Of course not. You might have upset me, a poor unstable cripple.” 

“Would you have rather I came and seen you?” 

“And shatter that cold distant mentor like persona you have worked years for?” she spat at him the sarcasm dripping from each word. “Oh no. Best to leave me to work through all this alone.”

“Were not going to get back into this again” he said stepping closer to her. 

She shook her head and chuckled, “Oh don’t worry Bruce, I won’t be throwing myself at you again. I’ll save that disappointment for someone much less dejected.” 

He moved with a speed only batman could, Barbara soon found herself being pick up out of the chair and sat on the counter top. Now she was eye to eye with Bruce. His body pressed close to hers, she could feel the heat coming off his chest and the even tempo of his breathing.

“What do you think you are doing?” She said moving her hands between them but making no movement to push him away. 

 

“Treating you like the child you insist on acting like.” He stepped back and folded his arms across his chest. “Now, I’ll ask a second time. What are you doing out there Barbara?”

She threw her head to the side not wanting to meet his eyes. How could she explain to him what it felt like to be useless? To have all these skills and abilities and not being able to use any of them. 

Blinking her eyes to keep the tears from spilling over she shook her head, “You wouldn’t understand.” 

Bruce pulled her chin softly so she was looking at him. “Try me.” He said catching her eyes with his.

“I….I wont make it living in this chair. I’m not strong enough.” She flexed her hands open and closed in her lap. “Physically I in peek condition, but mentally…….” She pulled her bottom lip into her mouth to keep it from quivering.

“Going back to a normal life, maybe if I had my legs, or maybe if it was my choice it would be different. But I never chose this. It was forced on me. I can’t stand being helpless.” She didn’t bother to hide the tears that fell from her eyes now. “Bruce I need this, these little victories. Even if they are just street thugs. They make me feel like I’m me. The real me, not this shell in a chair.”

Bruce stood and watched her weep silently, his mind slowly changing. Even if there was a 1% chance that Clarks blood could work, he had to take it. Seeing the pain in her eyes, it was clear to him. She was right, she wouldn’t survive if she was left in this chair. Pulling in a deep breath he decided.

 

Hearing him sigh she looked up at him. “Please, don’t take this away from me.”


End file.
